My Own Personal Bailout

Now that Obamessiah has made his presence to the Valley of the Sun, where do I apply for my own personal bailout?

According to the President, I can now apply and receive a subsidy for my mortgage. Heck, I may even be able to get it paid off in full!

Then there’s my job situation. Apparently, there are 70,000 jobs coming to Arizona. 45,000 of those jobs will land in Phoenix. Can someone please tell me where I can apply for that $70,000/year job?

In the words of the follower, Julio, “It’s such a blessing to see you Mr. President, Thank you for taking time out of your day! Oh Gracious God, Thank you so much!


  1. Those people at Dobson High School sure love our President. We’re glad you love him, too.

  2. I’m curious, DSW. If you fall under the guidelines of whatever it is Obama’s proposing (I haven’t read it yet), will you apply or not apply for government assistance?

    And if you do land one of the stimulus jobs, will you resign if you find out it’s being funded by the stimulus?

  3. God bless you in your troubles. Many middle-class people like us are struggling. Thanks to God for seinding us a President who cares about families!

  4. Klute,

    Members of the Sonoran Alliance have pledged never to take big-government money. They refuse Social Security and Medicare when they’re old because they know if they can’t afford it under the free market system, they don’t deserve it.

    Sonoran Alliance members don’t apply for Pell Grants in college. They pay their own way! And they go only to private colleges, never those liberal boondoogles that waste taxpayers’ mnoney.

    If they are laid off, members of Sonoran Alliance would rather make soup out of ketchup than collect that horrible scourge of socialism, unemployment compenastion benefits.

    They don’t even borrow books from the socialistic “public” libraries! Let’s hear it for these noble opponents of government spending! You can never accuse them of hypocrisy.

  5. Richard/Klute,

    So you are both OK when the federal government takes money out of your pockets a(under threat of force) and gives it away to some poor religious conservative family with eight children who will turn around and vote for a conservative Congress and President?

  6. Mr. Grayson,

    The reason Republicans will not be able to collect Social Security is because you and your Party just spent mine, my children’s and their children’s Social Security benefits. Republicans do take out college loans but the difference is they plan on paying the loan back. When Republicans are laid off they look for another job. They do not consider that as an excuse for a nice paid vacation. I guess you got me on the last one as my family uses the Library continually, but we do bring the books back on time.

  7. DSW: You’ve shared enough information about your personal life. I suspect that you might in fact be eligible for some mortgage relief.

    If you are, you should take it. If it means you and your family can afford to stay in your home, well, frankly, that mean’s you’re the type of family he’s targeting.

    This is not ideological. This is about seeing people who work hard, and need some help, getting what they deserve.

  8. DSW,

    In a word, yes. You assume that I give a damn about the political affiliation for the poor. I do not.

    The needy are the needy, regardless of who they pull their lever for, what God they worship, the color of the skin, and so on.

    I’ll marvel at the hypocrisy at those who complain about the guv’mint in Warshington and then say gimme, gimme, gimme (like say, in Appalachia), but if they need a hand, I want the government there to extend it.

    I love how Walt S. assumes that only Republicans look for a new job when they’re laid off. I was on the dole officially two weeks in my life, in between being laid off by IBM and finding a new job in the industry. Walt, you’re the an example why the GOP has been taking a regular beating… You think all the people who voted for Obama aren’t desperate for a job, to keep their houses, to provide for their children? Keep telling the majority of this country who voted for Obama that they’re shiftless and lazy and desire for nothing but comfort. See where that gets you.

  9. SonoranSam,

    “This is not ideological. This is about seeing people who work hard, and need some help, getting what they deserve.”

    Amen. It’s like trying to save a drowning dog. They’ll bite and snap and swim away from any helping hand extended to them.

  10. Those supposed “jobs” are as fictional as McCain’s $50 an hour for picking lettuce.

  11. Your Freudian slip is showing says

    “So you are both OK when the federal government takes money out of your pockets a(under threat of force) and gives it away to some poor religious conservative family with eight children who will turn around and vote for a conservative Congress and President?”

    Bitter, party of one!

  12. Klute, et al, I think what myself and most taxpayers object to is the government forcibly taking my hard earned money and then giving some of it back to me (in 8 dollar a week increments) or by taxing me more in the future to lower my mortgage rate for five years- (ie the end result of the mortgage plan)and then expect me to be thankful for it, like the government is doing me favor? Really does that honestly make sense to you?

    Agreed, Sonoran Sam, let me people work hard and get what they earn. That’s what conservatives ask of their government but that’s not what happens. The objective of this administration is to take from the responsible and hard working and give to those who are neither. I think that’s what I personally object to, and what I think a lot of others object to, though I can’t speak for them, of course.

  13. Nate,

    It makes as much since as using a credit card to make a large purchase, or mortgaging your house in the first place.

    “Ok. So this house is $100,000*, but with interest I’ll wind up paying $250,000 for it over the next 30 years. Makes sense.”

    Sometimes, if you want something now, something important (a house, a Great Depression-less economy), you have to pay more for it over time. Welcome to the world we live in. There’s dip over by the punch bowl.

    I hate paying taxes as much as I hate paying my water bill, my car payment, and so on. Today, my taxes paid for:

    The Scottsdale greenbelt I exercised on, the quality road I took to work, the water system I drank from, the people who ensured the BBQ sandwich I ate wasn’t crawling with E. coli, and the prison system that kept a bunch of bad guys off the streets (just to name a few things).

    I’m OK with taxes.

    * – wouldn’t it be grand?

  14. Kenny Jacobs says

    If your home is foreclosed, it decreases the value of your neighbor’s home. So, DSW, take the deal for your neighbor’s sake.

  15. David Smith says

    Q: “Where do I apply for my own personal bailout?

    A: You should review the information at and start gathering the requested documentation.

    On March 4th, you can contact your current mortgage lender to inquire about eligibility for a modification, or wait for them to notify you.

    There is at least one part of the plan that should help my household, which is removing barriers to refinance under current market rates.

    We are slightly above the 80% LTV threshold, and our mortgage rate is 6.5%.

    Dropping a point will save us money and cashflow; the incentive payments would be gravy.

  16. I think anyone who is still banking with the big banks (Citi, BofA, etc) should take their money out and move it to a Credit Union. Why are you putting your money in an institution that pays their CEOs those insane salaries which cuts into their ability to pay you a decent return on your deposit?

    Just a thought.

  17. Veritas Vincit says

    Veritas will take whatever is on the table with no qualms about it. This “stimulus” will only exacerbate the disaster we call an economy. And I will continue to oppose the Obamanation of Desolation until he follows in his father’s footsteps.

    Has anyone followed Iceland, or Ireland? Seen the riots in Bulgaria or Greece? Noticed that Germany has removed the barriers to complete nationalization of their banks? Oh, and the Islamic oriented slums in France continue to be violent ridden.

    Look around, the Titanic is sinking. This is going to be a long and dangerous slide into economic oblivion and the outcome is very shrouded in uncertainty. Look for ways to profit or find a lifeboat.

  18. Veritas Vincit says

    … and closer to home. Remitances to Mexico are down nearly a billion dollars; the Mexican federal budget is tagged to $70/bbl oil and oil is presently below $35/bbl and tourism (the third leg of Mexico’s economy) is down nearly 40%.

    What to do with all those previously ‘undocumented’ workers who did return home? Las Zetas is recruiting (and the money’s good)… problem is, Zeta is also recruiting on this side of the border too.

    And to think, some of our Arizona lawmakers want to open the border and eliminate employer sanctions too.

    Let’s end with this thought: What’s the value of money being printed today in huge quantities? And what happens when other economies retire the dollar as the world standard?

    hint: think Titanic

  19. I just hope that some of our more serious readers/commenters realize that the whole post was an exercise in facetiousness.

  20. Yes, of course we did. And we’re glad to see that while some may say that conservative Republicans are totally irrelevant to the debates in the current political and economic era, that you are performing what is the new, treasured role of conservative Republicans in these hard times with difficult decisions.

    The Sonoran Alliance is now doing what it does best: serving as comic relief.

  21. By a greater than 2:1 majority, Americans now say they prefer a government that actively tries to solve the problems facing society and the economy rather than one that stays out of society and the economy to the greatest extent possible. (58% vs. 26%). Overwhelming support for an activist approach crosses all demographic and political lines; only Republicans, conservatives, and 2008 McCain voters have any lingering doubts about the matter. In the 1980s and 1990s many, if not most, Americans believed, along with Ronald Reagan, that government was the problem, and not the solution to problems. In 2009, the American people have turned Mr. Reagan’s aphorism on its head even as Republicans in Congress and the media continue to preach that very old time religion.

  22. Republican does not mean Conservative says


    Public opinion may change over time, but the truth does not. The truth is that an activist government does much more to damage an economy than it does to help it.

    You also forgot to name one other group that generally does not support the stimulus: economists. I listened to my professor (one of the ASU professors that signed the CATO pledge against the stimulus)become indignant to the fact that Obama’s administration is associating this bill with any type of scholarly economics. My professor is totally free market and rightly pointed out that Keynes has been discredited for over 25 years in economic circles. However, even associating Keynes name with this stimulus is an insult to an intelligent (although somewhat socialist) man’s memory! I have had this professor for several upper division economic courses and have never seen him so seriously affronted ever before. It is sad to see this administration ignore some of the greatest free market thinkers of our time in favor of this disaster of a stimulus. The road back to a free market will take decades.

  23. Veritas Vincit says

    Your professor is correct. One of the best ways for example to address foreclosures due to unemployment would be for the lender to re-write the loan to a “foreclosure appraisal price” and allow the existing homeowner to remain in their home.

    For a lender to take $.30/dollar and eat the resulting losses (because they’re being absorbed by bail-out bucks) is absurd. Rewrite the loan to reflect reality. After all, writing down a loan of $200K to $130K still maintains a nifty interest payout over the term of the loan.

  24. This phony money society must die! The very few who take the time to back up 200 years will know the truth. Those who can’t, don’t or wont, we’ll just call them sheople since they don’t know any better. You can’t have money when all you have is debt, you can’t own anything when all you have is debt, you can’t be anything but a number when all you are is debt!

    You are born into it and have no choice!

    You goto work and get paid on debt so that you can pay more debt! Sheople like to play games they cannot win, welcome to America, the land of no brain debt payers with the illusion of freedom. All hail the “great” US of A!

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