Tired of the usual methods for giving amnesty to illegal aliens?
Well Republican candidate for State House in LD20, Frank Schmuck, has some ideas we guarantee you’ve never heard before. Schmuck is not just pro-amnesty, he’s downright giddy about it, designing a plan that would send illegal aliens to a civics version of traffic school.
Schmuck’s website has this extraordinary plan in great detail. For those of you without the time or lung capacity to read it all (we’ll deal with Schmuck’s abuse of the comma later), here is a quick summary. First, Schumck opposes a border fence as ineffective and he feels that the problem can be solved by giving our Minutemen, the military and our border agents the authority to use “necessary force” to keep our borders secure. Essentially, a “bullets, not barbed wire” approach that some voters might actually support. Then his plan completely unravels because it turns out that Schmuck only wants to lock up those illegal aliens who have committed “multiple crimes”, presumably unrelated to their actual illegal presence in the country, their working illegally, any abuses of our welfare system, etc. For whatever reason, committing one crime is not sufficient reason to go to jail. Why? Because, as Schmuck explains, their crime is otherwise the equivalent of a “speeding ticket”.
This brings us to Frank Schmuck’s Driving School for Good Citizenry, or whatever it is he’ll be calling it. In a nutshell, Arizona would create “education training” for illegals, give them “an ultimatum to remain in this country” and hold a job for five years, pay taxes, get driver’s insurance, get their wages garnished by the State of Arizona, learn English, history and civics, and then Arizona would send a certificate to the Federal Government stating that the illegal has successfully completed immigration training in Arizona and is prepared to take the US Citizenship test.
There is more to this program as it provides jobs for young people where they teach the classes and earn money towards college tuition, etc. The plan veers off into a plug for a community service program that provides apprenticeship as emergency responders to young legal Arizona residents. But since that has nothing to do with the Border, illegal immigration, or securing our State, which is the section this entire post resides in, we’ll set it aside and focus on this incredibly um, unique plan?
This insanity must be fantastic news to Rep. John McComish, Jeff Dial and Andy Swann, who are now the only three viable Republican candidates remaining in this contest.
Finally, for candidates who want to impress voters with quality websites, spell and grammar checks are a must. The following is a single sentence, divided up by an impressive thirteen commas. Do not attempt to read this out loud if you suffer from asthma or are on oxygen for any medical condition:
“If Arizona were to create an education training for immigrants, by identifying and documenting the immigrant, then giving them an ultimatum to remain in this country they need to hold a job for five years while paying taxes to the State and US, they also be required to have driver’s insurance, while we, the State, garnish a portion of their wages to pay for a required weekly schooling in our schools taught by American citizens, possibly our youth, where they can learn English, learn our history and learn our civics, then maybe we can turn this State and nation around and continue to build it, once again, on the backs of immigrants who want to be here for a better life but, want to be an American and will have earned that right.”
Sounds like he truly is a Schmuck!
That paragraph/sentence reminded me of the poor Miss Teen South Carolina and her rambling, nonsensical answer that made you-tube fame.
My inhaler! Someone, pass me my inhaler!
I’m torn here. Do I respect the man for standing by his beliefs, even when he knows they will be politically unpopular? Or do I marvel at the lack of political sense that a Republican candidate would campaign on the notion that violating our borders, our employment laws, our welfare laws, etc. is the same as a speeding ticket? I’m not in Schmuck’s district, but if I were this would be all I needed to know about the guy. Wow.
Upon reviewing Schmuck’s plan, Russell Pearce’s head exploded, John McCain was quoted as saying “Even I think that’s amnesty” and Jeff Flake slapped his own forehead and said “Darn, that’s brilliant! I wish I had thought of that plan!”
And….he is a favorite in our district! Yikes! I’m campaigning hard for Jeff Dial!
Does he really want to give illegals an ultimatum to remain in America? I’m speechless! That’s like me telling my kids they can’t play with their toys unless they finish their dessert. Not exactly running as the “Law and Order” candidate now, is he?
You know, the worst part is he came close to a good idea, and that’s a driving school for illegal aliens. THAT would have been a good idea. But the guy actually got the name right, then took the driving classes out of the driving school, replacing them with civics. Mind-boggling.
That sounds a lot like La Mordida to me. All the drug dealers will send in fresh mules with plenty of cash to pay the fines.
Also, how do you garnish the wages of those who work under the table ?
How about a thirty day grace to register(fingerprints/ DNA)with the state,and then *
* Fred, let’s tone it down just a bit.
Sorry just a little tired of all the lipservice from our elected officials,as the invasion continues to disrupt our schools,hospitals,jails,social services,etc.
Here’s an idea,lets enforce our laws,huh,that was easy
Hey, where did the page go? I went looking and now you need a password and username? What’s up with that?
This article is not a correct characterization of Team Schmuck’s positions on these issues. Rather, they are based on misplaced articles that found their way to our website. Until Team Schmuck’s positions on these issues are posted, we request those hold back on inaccurate comments and innuendo.
Frank believes in border enforcement first and foremost and punishment for those who violate the law.
For more information, you can speak with Frank personally at XXX-XXX-XXXX.
Gene Ganssle
for Team Schmuck
Oh please… You can’t be serious. So now what, you’re saying it was just Schmuck’s first draft? Not likely, but even if you’re telling the truth, its still damning. His instincts are all wrong. Even if you sit him down and explain how its political suicide and he now comes out like Russell Pearce reincarnated, we’ll always know that his instincts are completely PRO-AMNESTY. We won’t be fooled.
They “found their way to our website”? How do articles do that? They posted themselves? Was that before or after they wrote themselves? This clown can’t be serious. Obviously the Schmuck campaign is in full-on crisis mode now and they’re spinning for all they’re worth.
What a typical politician this dirtbag is turning out to be. Taking an unpopular position but sticking to your guns may cost you votes, but you’d deserve the respect that comes with defending your beliefs. Now he’s lost the votes and the respect.
This is a three-man race now.
Just win, baby?
We won’t be fooled?
Calling a fellow Republican a dirtbag?
I’m losing respect for people who sit and type without actually having the guts to call the candidate and accurately getting his position.
Frank’s # is 480-831-0558. His cell is 602-770-0558.
G2
Gene,
Sounds like you guys are in a tailspin. First, it’s absolutely horrible that you and Team Schmuck would outright lie to the voters by claiming that the “issues” page on the Schmuck website was an error. Sounds like typical political back peddling to me.
Clearly everybody now knows what Frank’s true thoughts are on the critical issues facing Arizona. He’s now lost my trust and my vote. Frank has shown that he is incompetent as a candidate and has shown very poor leadership characteristics. In short, he’s not someone that any voter in District 20 should want representing them in the Arizona Legislature.
I got news for you Greg, some Republicans are dirtbags. So are some Democrats and some Independents. I’m not less credible because I’m calling a Republican a dirtbag. I think Mark Foley’s a dirtbag for entirely different reasons. Yet you would try to discredit me for calling Mark Foley a dirtbag? Puh-leeze.
The spin you guys are trying here shows a tremendous lack of integrity and frankly, a real disrespect for the voters’ intelligence. Thanks for posting Frank’s cell numbers. Now, if anyone wants to be lied to directly, we don’t have to deal with surrogates like you.
I don’t have to call him to get his position. HE PUT IT ON HIS WEBSITE SO THE WORLD COULD SEE. Only now that its blowing back at him, does he hide it, then want to change it. And his PR flak wants us all to call Schmuck personally to get his new/old opinion?
Taking a bad position would have hurt his chances, I agree. But trying to spin it all this new way sounds the death knell.
I think Greg is doing an admirable PR job here, but I’d like to see more detail from him on what he claims is Schmuck’s position on illegal immigration. Greg writes “Frank believes in border enforcement first and foremost and punishment for those who violate the law.”
Well, we’ve heard the “border enforcement first” line before, but Frank’s earlier words oppose the construction of a fence as ineffective. Basically, shooting illegal aliens was suggested as a deterrent in Schmuck’s initial plan (he calls it necessary force) but I think a fence would be far more humane.
But expansion is called for when Greg says that Schmuck wants “punishment” for violators. Keep in mind that Schmuck’s initial proposal of illegal alien driving school WAS his proposed punishment. Greg isn’t actually retracting Frank’s position, he’s just rephrasing it to sound tough and acceptable.
John McCain thought that the punishment should be to pay a fine and learn English. He now claims that he has heard everyone’s objections and that “he gets it”.
Schmuck still doesn’t get it. His punishment isn’t really a punishment, his understanding of the problem is fatally flawed, and his plan will reward lawbreakers with citizenship.
That is amnesty, no matter what your PR guy calls it.